Thimbleberry…and Conkers Bday…

i forgot most of this now.
so heres what i rememebr:

Tog took 4 hours to collect Dog n Filth in the hired minibus and turned up with a Massive dent in the side.

I threw Filth across the minibus after an hour of him groping me and squawkng in my face…

Conker slipped into the Khole – SLIPPing down the back of Gee’s seat like a demented slug……

and disappeared under his seat with faint yelps coming from the back “help ” “help” we turned rounfd and he was stuck firmly under his seat with his cartoon-monster like arm protruding and griping the seat. Filth pulled him out and he his head floated up to the cieling like a helium ballooon with his retarded Edvarn Munch like mad face stuck on it.

i litereally pissed myself.

after fuckin HOURS in the bus Tog got us lost.
we found a pissed bloke in a small village who got in the van. we named him “Als Birthday Present” just before doghouse belched”Are you comfortable with your sexuality :” at him….

we arrived to a mad stinking party which if you imagine pouring a truck load of ketamine onto the fragle rock set and pullin all their teeth out and sticking 20k of techno in their faces/../….you are getting somewhere near.

Spoke to Merv from Eat Static who confrmed that Craig is in fact a roadie and he talked about producing us and releasing our album – all sounded very promising….
The party descended into a load of MASH heads dancing to whacky shit 70s music , beegees and shit…..so i fucked off to the van with dickie. we threw the hitchiker into Filths tent and gave him P&Os sleeping bag. flaked out.

the weekend passed and dghouse was wankered. trying to pull everything that breathed and boshin shit like no fuckers bizzness.. he ate a hot chilli pepper nearly exploded then fell asleep in a portaloo. rock n fucking roll.
he turned up just in time for the show and
we played a shit gig to a MASSIVE crowd who seemed to love it.. FUC/K NOSe why… we have steadily got fucking worse over the last year!!!!!

freezed my nips off and after another 10 hours in the van got home to gimp boy tommy in bed when he was being paid by me to run my night in GLo . not happy.

ah well.

bOLLOCKS.

lessons learned:

1. Never let Tog drive again. (he likes to get wankered anyway!- so stick with the live recordings)
2. Never let Tog or Filth navigate EVER again.
3. Try and arrive on day of gig as the band are HIGH on that night and normally hanging night after.
4. Try and keep Dohouse backstage until the show for maximum impact.
5. Never expect Tommy to be on time.



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